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Our Dirty Little Secret

I have a confession to make; please don’t be quick to judge me.

I am not particularly proud of it and it’s not the easiest thing to admit to the whole world, but I feel that if I am able to be open and candid about the situation, maybe I can help someone else who struggles with the same issue.

I remember the first time like it was yesterday. 
As I drove by late one night, I caught sight of that solid frame and those long legs standing out there on the corner. I had to do a double take because I was astonished as to how a creation so well put together could ultimately reach the point of being relegated to a solitary street corner. I don’t know what came over me, but in that moment of weakness, or madness, I made a decision that would ultimately change my life. 

I decided that I would not be returning home alone that night.


I parked a few blocks away and threw on my hoodie as I walked back just to make sure no one would recognize me. I decided I would first walk by a couple times just to make sure that the coast was clear and really decide if this was something I wanted to do. 


As I got closer, I was able to get a better look. Those legs were even more impressive up close than from my initial drive-by. Sure they had some miles on them, but that’s to be expected right? Anyway, at this point I was convinced that I was going to do this. 


I’m not going to lie; I felt a bit awkward and, dare I say, “dirty” about the whole situation, but I kept telling myself that this is New York. This kind of thing happens all the time even though most people probably wouldn’t admit it.
 
Rationalize it as I may, it didn’t necessarily make me feel any less self-conscious about what I was about to do. I kept looking nervously around me thinking at any moment I would be caught and exposed in this shameful act. 
 
I mean the whole experience was a bit over-dramatic on my part because, let’s be fair here, picking up furniture off the side of the road is hardly a crime. 

In fact, the real crime would be to see such an ornate high chair that someone had left on the side of the street and not take it home with me. Heck, if anything I was doing the city a favor and cleaning up for them, not to mention recycling.

Besides, if I didn’t take it, someone else would have because this was truly a well-crafted piece and exactly the kind of chair that would be perfect for my breakfast counter. I wasn’t going to just let an opportunity like that pass by!

I mean this is New York City and come the end of the month, people go curb-crawling all the time, picking up stuff that people moving out don’t want anymore. It may not be the most glamorous way to stumble upon furniture, but sometimes you come across that one thing that will bring you down to that level.

I guess there’s truth in the saying that one man’s trash can become another man’s treasure. However, what they conveniently fail to mention is that it can also becomes that man’s dirty little secret.

Featured Image by Wassim Loumi on Flickr
Attribution-ShareAlike 2.0 Generic (CC BY-SA 2.0)

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2 Comments

  1. Avatar

    Ugonna Onyekwe

    December 19, 2012 at 11:14 pm

    Haha, Jonathan I trust that you would be guilty of the same sin! Don’t worry after we pull off that our little job with BOA we wont have to sink to these levels anymore 😉

  2. Avatar

    Jonathan Anyumba

    December 18, 2012 at 11:55 pm

    Thank you for being the trail blazer here, I feel better about what I have done..here’s my confession, My entire basement at one point was entirely made up of furniture and items that folks had left on the curb, and i used to drive 2 miles an hour on bulk trash days looking for stuff. Once in a while i still get the urge and satisfy it with a drive around the neighborhood on bulk days…

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